I sit here at work typing with a swollen hand. I feel like a wimp, while my mom and sister were here I watched my mom work tirelessly on my yard. She works harder than I can.. I had to stop last night when I started hurting. I see compulsion in the way that she works that I have alway tried to emulate to a destructive degree in the past. I don’t think it’s been entirely healthy for her either though. Anyhow, even with all the work done now I still spend my time kicking myself for the work not done, and being a homeowner the work is never be completely done, that’s the kicker.

So before I lament what’s not done, here is what is..



I still need to finish the edging on this part..

I think in a small way I have come to grips with what my limitations are with what I can accompish day to day. I had started to accept that, then when I became a mother.. and it was hammered home. You can’t parent properly and do a 76 hour remodel deathmarch, or packing or unpacking-fest, or anything where I would work from dawn till the middle of the night stopping for no one.

Acceptance is one thing, not still beating myself up for it is another.